Love 'n Lies - I have my Book in my Hands

I hold my book in my hands. My very own book. That I wrote.

I haven't the words to express the joy, the astonishment, the disbelief of seeing my very own book. I hold it. I stroke it. I smile as I look upon it.

See, I did write this book. And I had it accepted for publication - thank you Sirens Call Publications.
That by itself seemed unreal. Bits swimming in the ethernet, never to be seen. Understand?

But, by being hardcopy, bound in a format I'm more used to seeing. Now that's real to me. Absolute. Definite. Whole.

This I can hold. I can touch. I can smell. Flip the pages. It is a concrete representation of my hard work. As the bits in the cloud can never be. It feels REAL. Like my dream has come true.

I'm looking at it now. Love 'n Lies. By me. Stroking it. Loving its weight.

I worked with my publishing house to fashion that cover. I had ideas. Nina had ideas. Together, we designed that cover. It pleases me. 
I wrote all the pages. Then I worked with editor Gloria to tweak it into the best it could be. Believe me, I quailed when I opened the first edits. It hurts to be shown how you've screwed up. But she encouraged me to see it as just small touch-ups, like the proper shoelaces to set off the whole outfit. And, believe me, I learned from those hints.
I turn the book over and reread the blurb, the catch. Yes, I wrote some of that. It's catchy, I think. I'd read the book based on that back cover.
Now I flip through the pages, sniffing to catch that new-book smell. Better than new car any day. I haven't read this copy. I'm not sure I can. I'll cringe if I try, knowing where I'd change it if I had another chance.
I check my name on the net and find the book listed. My publishing house, my publicist Julianne, made this happen.  

But I know I wrote it.

I learned a lot about writing, going through the full publishing process of this book. I will be a better writer next book. Because I can now see where I must grow, write stronger, write better. I will Make, not show next book. Make the scenes blossom where they need to be seen, Make the character strong where she needs to show strength, Make the action flow with a series of drivers.
See, David Farland? I learn from your Daily Kick in the Pants. 

I have grown as a writer. I hope to keep on growing as I try to write all the stories that have queued up in my brain.