Love 'n Lies - I have my Book in my Hands

I hold my book in my hands. My very own book. That I wrote.

I haven't the words to express the joy, the astonishment, the disbelief of seeing my very own book. I hold it. I stroke it. I smile as I look upon it.

See, I did write this book. And I had it accepted for publication - thank you Sirens Call Publications.
That by itself seemed unreal. Bits swimming in the ethernet, never to be seen. Understand?

But, by being hardcopy, bound in a format I'm more used to seeing. Now that's real to me. Absolute. Definite. Whole.

This I can hold. I can touch. I can smell. Flip the pages. It is a concrete representation of my hard work. As the bits in the cloud can never be. It feels REAL. Like my dream has come true.

I'm looking at it now. Love 'n Lies. By me. Stroking it. Loving its weight.

I worked with my publishing house to fashion that cover. I had ideas. Nina had ideas. Together, we designed that cover. It pleases me. 
I wrote all the pages. Then I worked with editor Gloria to tweak it into the best it could be. Believe me, I quailed when I opened the first edits. It hurts to be shown how you've screwed up. But she encouraged me to see it as just small touch-ups, like the proper shoelaces to set off the whole outfit. And, believe me, I learned from those hints.
I turn the book over and reread the blurb, the catch. Yes, I wrote some of that. It's catchy, I think. I'd read the book based on that back cover.
Now I flip through the pages, sniffing to catch that new-book smell. Better than new car any day. I haven't read this copy. I'm not sure I can. I'll cringe if I try, knowing where I'd change it if I had another chance.
I check my name on the net and find the book listed. My publishing house, my publicist Julianne, made this happen.  

But I know I wrote it.

I learned a lot about writing, going through the full publishing process of this book. I will be a better writer next book. Because I can now see where I must grow, write stronger, write better. I will Make, not show next book. Make the scenes blossom where they need to be seen, Make the character strong where she needs to show strength, Make the action flow with a series of drivers.
See, David Farland? I learn from your Daily Kick in the Pants. 

I have grown as a writer. I hope to keep on growing as I try to write all the stories that have queued up in my brain.

E Readers - to buy or not

I do not have an e-reader. Not yet. I won't until I can find a reader that doesn't have a shine, so like magazines, that I find hard to read through. My old eyes cannot take the medium, cannot find the right slant or position so that the words flow into my brain properly.

Hey e-Reader manufacturers! Listen to me! Build one that opens like a book, that feels like a book - well maybe not quite so heavy. Make it nostalgic. Call it Retro. Or some kind of Punk.  Advertise it as the whole reading experience.

To me, e-Readers don't feel right. Their single page format offends me somehow. Not that I dislike it. Maybe if I had to open the reader I'd be happier. It would look more like an old-style book to me then. Able to hold the memory of reading, properly.

Call me old-fashioned. I grew up with books. Lots of books. My father taught me to read.  He encouraged me to read books beyond my ability, knowing I'd learn those hard words easier in context, within good stories.

I have good memories of old books' smells. Of hours escaping into whatever land they built, whatever story they developed.

I don't have any such memories with  reading books on the computer. Sure, I try. I download something, open the file and start to read. Somehow it feels so impersonal, too clinical. It has none of the personal zones I associate with a story worth reading.

Now I can write for hours on the computer and not feel any lack of comfort. My memories don't have that kind of expectation. See, I've worked for years on computers, in an office setting. No one expects comfort at the office. We're there for a set period of hours, to work. Not feel good.

My home computer, where I now work, isn't a comfy spot where I can squirm around until I've just the right position, tuck my blanket over me, set my tea in an easily available spot to grab without looking. No. It's a functional spot where I sit and write. Next to the telephone, under a skylight. Functional. My chair is comfortable to sit and type. I don't mind losing myself in my worlds in that place. I barely notice my area once I'm building my worlds.

Now reading, for pleasure? That's a totally different ball of string. I need creature comforts. I need to be able to immerse myself in someone else's world. I like handling their book, smelling that paper and ink smell that, to me, spells reading. I have a very comfortable chair, with a light over my shoulder, a shelf for my tea, a footstool and an afghan to snuggle up in. An awesome place to cuddle up with a good book. All I need is a fire for perfection.



Maybe, when I find the right kind of e-reader, I will be able to sink into a comfortable position in my reading chair, tune out the world around me and lose myself in that kind of good book.Only then can I build sweet memories with an e-Reader.