Summertime Blues

I consider myself one of the lucky ones.  We have a summer place.  I'm not talking a home away from home.  No, we're not rich.  We have a little trailer in a cooperatively owned plot of land just inside one of Alberta's few lakes's borders - in fact we only became part of the town 2 years ago. 

This small development has 116 trailers, each on their own approx 2800 sq ft of land, a cooperatively owned clubhouse, back 'forty' where old trailers and boats go to die and a forelorn baseball diamond rests unused, a bathhouse, hot tub and pool. 

Therein lies the problem.  The Pool and Hottub.

Neither are very big.  The hottub holds 4 adults as per the rules.  The pool's deep end is 6 feet deep and maybe 20 x 15.  Maybe.  The shallow end starts at about 2 1/2 feet.  All told the pool might be 40x15.  It has a 10 foot chain link fence surrounding it.  There is no lifeguard on duty.  The pool has an access code panel at over 4 feet off the ground so the little ones can't get in on their own.  Supposedly.

The rules of the pool area are simple.  Adult only swim from 0800-0900.  No children under the age of 14 allowed in pool without adult/guardian supervision.  No children under the age of 4 in hot tub.  Take a shower before entering.  Take a shower if you've laid out in the sun with suntan lotion on, or just sweated during your tanning session.  No drinks or food allowed.  No large floatation devices.  Don't dive.  Don't run.  Don't swear.  Don't make undue noise.  Pool closes at 2200.

Fairly simple, right?

Wrong!

For some reason some of the owners of this little slice of heaven feel they don't need to obey any of these rules.   They send their >14 year old children down without any adults, to run, scream, jump on whoever's in the pool, don't insist the darlings go through the shower, blow up the monstrous floatation devices and insist their darlings get to use them to the detriment of all other swimmers.

Now the mommas who are most flagrant in their flouting of these rules will call any adult who asks the kids, reasonably, to shower, take the float out of the pool, stop screaming, stop running, leave the hot tub (especially if there is 10 of the darlings jumping around in the hottub), a bully.

The worst of these mommas are what I'd call the ex-cheerleader set.  All mouth, no brains.  I'm not sure they can actually read - maybe to do with Canada's 'no child left behind' school policy whereby the unable-to-learn/refuse-to-learn child advances through the system to keep up to with age-peers.

My husband and I were in the pool late yesterday afternoon, just idly floating and bobbing around.  By ourselves.  About 7 children, none over the age of 16, entered the pool area, in swim suits.  Without showering.  I asked them to leave and shower.  They muttered more than a few obscenities.  So I asked who might be the adult  supervising the group.  Now I've had trouble with one of these kids' mothers last year over a large float  the kid kept throwing on my head while I was in the water along with 25 others.
 
Well, low and behold, not one of the darlings was over 16.  Five were under 10.

So I sent them back to their trailers to get parental supervision.  I mean, yes I could have supervised.  Would you after the response I got asking them to follow one rule?   I'd rather watch the darlings drown at this point.  Happily.


I knew what the end result was going to be here.  But hey, if one of their darlings drowned or caught a bad infection, we'd all lose the pool.  And the ex-cheerleader, nasty-mouthed momma would probably blame me!


Enter dragon bully ex-cheerleader - the bitch momma from last year that none of the other mommas (whose darlings were following the rules) wanted to have any confrontation with.  She stalked into the pool area.  Her >8 year old child managed to get his hair through the shower, but she didn't say a word.  Just clamped her teeth around that righteous smirk.  My husband asked if he'd showered as he got set to jump into the pool.

She almost ran to the pool edge to defend the brat.  "We all pay the same fee.  Leave my child alone.  I will not allow you to bully him any further."  Oh so sweetly spoken through her clenched teeth.

Ok, a mother can and should defend her child.

But lets look at facts here.  My husband asked a question.  He did not bully anyone.  If anyone was in bully mode, let the mother of Unit 10, the obviously over 40 dragon lady, wear that shoe.  Her son did not follow the rules.  She validated his refusal to follow these rules.  Rules set out by the Public Health Department for everyone's health safety.

As a parent myself, I believe that children should follow rules.  Sensible rules or not.  And if they don't like the rules, find a way to change them.  Don't just flout them.  I've taught my kids to learn all the rules, and then, if they don't agree, go to someone with enough authority with a reasoned argument to request a change.  I'll back them in that endeavour.

Yesterday (and last year many times) this child learned that rules are for others - not him.  He learned that even if he is wrong, his momma will bully even other adults to defend him in situations where he knows he is wrong.  Hey, I watched and saw the look in his eyes and that gloating trimphant grin. 

Now, maybe she can't read.  She certainly managed to miss the very large yellow and black 'Shower Before Entering Pool Area' sign on the entrance door.

I do consider her one of the ex-cheerleader type.  She's got a big mouth and very little used grey matter.  I'm going by the conversations I overheard here.  At least that's the face we see here at our resort.  Maybe she just allows her real self to show here and she's normally a reasonable adult.  But I have my doubts.

I can only feel very sorry for the rude awakening her son will one day soon experience.  I can imagine the yellow rap sheet growing on this kid from the time he's 12.  His momma will never believe he could possibly in the wrong - oh no, not her angel!  By the time he's 16, he'll have done time in juvie and be ready for the big time penalities. 

In the meantime, I will enjoy my pool.  I will swim during the adult only time, insisting that only adults enter at that point.  I will follow the rules.  And I will insist those rules also be followed by everyone who comes in when I am present.

If that makes me a bully, so be it.